14th AUGUST.FRIDAY, WEEK 19

1.Jos 24:24:1-13

2.Matthew 19:3-12

Feast: Maximilian Kolbe

Maximillian Maria Kolbe (1894-1941) was a polish conventual Fransiscan friar, who volunteered to die in place of a family man in the death camp of Auschwitz near Krakow, in World war II. He is the patron saint of drug addicts, political prisoners, families, journalists, prisoners and the pro-life movement.

MEDITATIONS AND REFLECTIONS

From the gospel reading Jesus restates God’s original design for marriage: “a man shall not leave his father and mother and cling to his wife, and the two shall become as one.” The disciples of Jesus having recognized the heroic conditions for marriage thus this gave an implication to his disciples that, “it was not to marry?” Jesus explicitly states that life long fidelity fidelity is possible only for “those to whom it is given to do so.” Fidelity is a divine –based promise undertaken by husband and wife, heroic in one sense, yet normal in another way. God’s graces of sacramental marriage, helping and motivating the spouses, transform this high demand into routine daily affection and respect towards each other.

In today’s gospel, the leaders are presented as testing Jesus, because his teaching on marriage went much further than what the Jewish law required. Some Jewish rabbis of the permissive bent allowed husbands to divorce their wives under the pretext, such as when the wife is no longer pleasing to her husband because she does not know how to cook or to keep house, she develops and unsightly warts or mole in her face or when she is no longer the young and slender girl he married. In such cases a man could write out a document of divorce and fee himself for another marriage. When the Jews presented the matter of divorce to Jesus, the Lord reminded his listeners that divorce and subsequent marriage leads to the grave sin of adultery. This was a hard lesson to take then, and it is a hard lesson to accept now. Jesus then took them all the way back to the beauty of God’s original plan as presented in Genesis. Moreover, he added, “What God has joined together, let no man put asunder,” (Mk10:9). Finally, Jesus placed the question of marriage in the context of integrity of the family: the children’s welfare should be taken into consideration when difficulties come up in a home.

They suspected that Jesus would go against what Jewish law allowed regarding marriage, viz. Divorce in certain circumstances. Their suspicions were well founded. His ideal of marriage was more radical than what Jewish law required. He called on men and women to marry for life, appealing to the book of genesis to support this teaching. We are all aware that many marriages do not last for life; relationships break down, and people go their separate ways. That is the reality. The gospels show us how Jesus accepted the reality of people’s lives; he engaged with people as they were. He relates to all of us in the concrete situation of our lives. Yet, he had a vision, God’s vision, for human life, including married life. He proclaimed that vision while continuing to relate in a loving way to all who could  not reach it, for whatever reason. That includes us all, because none of us lives up fully to the values Jesus proclaimed and lived. There will always be that two-fold aspect to Jesus’ relationship with us; he loves us where we are, but keeps calling us beyond where we are.

One afternoon, according to an old sufi tale, Nasruddin and his friend were sitting in a cafe, drinking  tea and talking about life and love.

“ How can you never got married, Nasruddin?” asked his friend at one point.

“ Well,” said Nasruddin, “ to tell you the truth, I spent my youth looking for the perfect woman. In Cairo, I met a beautiful and intelligent woman, with eye like dark olives but she was unkind.”

“Then in Baghdad, I met a woman who was a wonderful and generous soul, but we had not interests in common.”

“One woman after another would seem just right, but there would always be something missing. Then one day, I met her. She was beautiful, intelligent, generous and kind. We had everything in common. In fact she was perfect. “Well,” said Nasruddin’s friend, “what happened? Why didn’t you marry her?” Nasrudding sipped his tea reflectively. “Well,” he replied, “it’s a sad thing. It seemed she was looking for the perfect man.”

Lesson:  Marriages are not made in heaven. There is no perfect marriage, no perfect partners either. Marriage is a work in progress; it does not stop until..... The two shall become one..... so they are no longer two but one flesh.”